


Cardiac Arrest

by kinkyacewonho (butwordsareallineed)



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, F/F, First Kiss, Genderswap, Masturbation, Monsta X Bingo, Rule 63, Sexuality Crisis, fem!kihyun, fem!wonho
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-28
Updated: 2017-05-27
Packaged: 2018-10-12 07:03:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10485117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/butwordsareallineed/pseuds/kinkyacewonho
Summary: Kihyun didn’t think she was interested in girls but Hoseok is magnetic, drawing her in like a satellite hooked in orbit.





	1. High Voltage in Her Lips

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the “Neighbors” square of the winter edition of Monsta X Bingo.

They’re drunk the first time they kiss.

They’re at a frat party—Hoseok’s idea, partly because she wanted the free booze, and partly to show off how hot she got over the summer after her ex-boyfriend broke up with her. He rebounded with a younger girl, and she got serious about fitness, earning a toned, trim body Kihyun is only slightly jealous of.

Hoseok’s in a crop top and tiny denim shorts that show off her body and two of her tattoos: the Jean-Paul Sartre quote on her upper thigh is fully visible, while the tail of the dragon design inked on her ass peeks out beneath the frayed hem of her shorts.

Kihyun can’t stop staring.

One of the frat boys notices, and suddenly a stranger’s arm is slung around her shoulder, the stench of alcohol and cheap weed heavy on his breath as he leers, “I’ll pay you 20 bucks to make out with her.”

Kihyun’s a college student; it’s hard to say no to easy money. She looks up at Hoseok, who must have heard the dare too because she’s grinning.

“Double it and I’ll grab her boobs.”

The boy produces two grubby bills from his wallet to prove he’s got the cash, then Hoseok pushes Kihyun down onto a nearby couch, straddling her hips before Kihyun can protest.

Not that she would. Hoseok is beautiful, and her thighs are warm as she settles in Kihyun’s lap. Kihyun didn’t think she was interested in girls but Hoseok is magnetic, drawing her in like a satellite hooked in orbit.

“You heard the man,” Hoseok whispers, leaning so close Kihyun can feel her eyelashes against her cheek. It’s hard to breathe. “Kiss me.”

So Kihyun does. Hoseok tastes like beer and bubblegum, and as Kihyun presses their lips together, Hoseok presses closer, sliding further up Kihyun’s lap. She cups Kihyun’s face with one hand, the other sliding down to her chest, and when she squeezes her breast, Kihyun moans.

Kihyun reaches out, wanting to touch too, but before she can place a hand on Hoseok’s thighs or chest or stomach, Hoseok gets up, grabbing the money from the frat boy before he can weasel away.

“Thank you,” Hoseok chirps, pocketing the bills as she eyes the tent forming in the boy’s pants. “And you’re welcome for the show.”

She reaches for Kihyun’s hand, pulling her off the couch and to her feet again. Kihyun doesn’t think she could stand otherwise. She feels dizzy, and she’s pretty sure it’s not from the alcohol.

 

Hoseok would have been content to pass out in a spare room at the frat house, but Kihyun’s heard enough horror stories to know better, and after a bit of coaxing she convinced Hoseok to come back to the dorm with her. Their dorm rooms are connected by a bathroom, so they’re suitemates, or neighbors, but they aren’t roommates, and Kihyun is grateful for that.

Kihyun's roommate Minhyuk is out when they get back from the party, so she doesn’t bother with pajamas, stripping out of her clothes and sliding into bed.

When she closes her eyes, she sees Hoseok, the way she looked just before they kissed, with her lips hovering centimeters away from Kihyun. If she focuses, she can almost feel the warmth of her breath ghosting across Kihyun’s face.

Her hand slips between her thighs as she replays the kiss in her mind, recreating every detail and then taking it further. Hoseok doesn’t just squeeze her breast; she slides her hands beneath her shirt and unhooks her bra, moving it out of the way so she can cup both of her breasts in her large hands.

Kihyun’s breath hitches, middle finger slowly rubbing circles over her clit. She imagines it’s Hoseok’s hand, rubbing under her skirt at the party, and she bites down on her pillow to swallow her moan.

She cums with three fingers deep inside of herself, imagining Hoseok’s head between her thighs. She has to physically fight the urge to cry out her name.

When it’s over, she feels dirty, the weight of guilt settling in her gut as she wipes the cum off her fingers onto her thighs. She’ll shower in the morning. Maybe when she’s sober she’ll be able to blame everything on the alcohol.


	2. Beg the Ceiling for Forgiveness ('Cause I Don't Want to Remember What I Did Last Night)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long to get this chapter up. Thank you for being patient, and hopefully Chapter 3 won't take as long!

Kihyun wakes with a headache. She didn’t drink enough to cause a serious hangover, but there are still side effects of consuming too much alcohol, and the dull hammering just above her left eye is one of them.

She glances over to see if Minhyuk came back during the night—the bed is still empty, which means she’s probably spending the weekend at her boyfriend’s place again. Kihyun stumbles out of bed, not bothering with clothes since she’s going to take a shower anyway, and throws back a glass of water with two acetaminophen pills to try to kill her headache.

She’s glad it’s the weekend, so she doesn’t have to suffer through an early morning class like this. Hopefully after a shower and breakfast at the mess hall she’ll be energized enough to work on the essay that’s due next week. She meant to work on it last night, until Hoseok distracted her by dragging her out to the party.

Hoseok is very persuasive, and Kihyun doesn’t trust her at frat parties by herself. Hoseok would give her last dollar to a man covered in meth sores begging for money, making her easy prey for the would-be sex offenders who lurk at those kinds of parties.

Not to mention Hoseok was already dressed in those teeny tiny shorts when she came into Kihyun’s room to ask. It was hard to say no to the opportunity to see more of her in those.

Kihyun grabs a fresh towel from her dresser and pushes open the bathroom door, neatly folding the towel over her designated towel rack. There are four, one for each resident of the suite.

The air in the bathroom is heavier than usual, thick with dissipating steam. Hoseok or her roommate must have just taken a shower; Kihyun hopes there’s still enough hot water left for hers.

She slips on her shower shoes, a cheap pair of flip flops she picked up at a department store, and slides back the shower curtain to get in.

The shower isn’t empty, and Kihyun drops the curtain, heart racing in panic at the sight in front of her: Hoseok standing in the shower, naked.

Hoseok turns at the sound of the curtain rustling, looking remarkably unsurprised to see Kihyun standing there. “Oh, Kiki! Did I forget to lock the door?”

Kihyun nods, because her tongue feels too fat to move. Hoseok must have just turned the water off because she’s still dripping, water droplets clinging to her shoulders, neck, and chest. Kihyun tries not to stare, but Hoseok isn’t making any efforts to cover herself, and she’s right there, wet and naked and beautiful. Kihyun’s willpower is only so strong, and when a drop of water slides past Hoseok’s collarbone and down the valley of her breasts, Kihyun can’t help but follow it with her eyes, wishing she could chase it with her tongue.

“Did you need the shower?” Hoseok asks, her voice remarkably calm considering the circumstances. Kihyun blushes, hoping Hoseok didn’t notice the focus of her gaze.

“I’m sorry, I d-didn’t know you were in here,” she stammers, and Hoseok chuckles, stepping out of the shower and closer to her.

“Don’t worry about it. I’m the one who forgot to lock the door. And besides, I got to see you naked too, so we’re even.” She winks, and it’s only then Kihyun remembers she’s just as naked as Hoseok. With a panicked squeal, she darts into the shower, pulling the curtain shut behind her so Hoseok can’t see her anymore. She hears the sound of Hoseok’s giggles on the other side of the curtain, and her stomach fucking flutters, like a schoolgirl with a crush.

“I’m going to the cafeteria after I get dressed. Do you want me to wait for you?”

Kihyun nods, before remembering Hoseok can’t see her nod through the curtain. “Um, sure, if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t mind!”

Kihyun expected Hoseok would want to avoid her; it’s what Kihyun would do if someone walked in on her naked. And Hoseok has plenty of other friends. She doesn’t need to wait on Kihyun to have company for breakfast. But Hoseok is just so nice. It makes Kihyun feel even guiltier about what she did last night.

With shaky hands, she turns the shower on cold.


	3. Step 3: Pretend You Don't Remember

Hoseok’s outfit today is thankfully much less revealing: a pair of skintight athletic pants and a multicolored sports bra that peeks out beneath her black tank top. She’s going for a run after breakfast. Kihyun feels impossibly dowdy in her oversized hoodie and comfiest pair of jeans.

“You look cute,” Hoseok tells her. Kihyun knows she’s only saying it to be nice.

In the cafeteria, Kihyun looks over the selections, trying to find something that isn’t terrible for her. What she really wants is a cinnamon roll, or waffles—something sugary and decadent with zero nutritional value. But she had enough trouble getting into her jeans this morning without the extra calories, so she settles for fruit and a piece of plain toast.

Hoseok grabs a container of yogurt before leading Kihyun to find an empty table.

“Is that all you’re eating?” Kihyun asks.

Hoseok shrugs. “I don’t like to work out on a heavy stomach. I’ll eat a big lunch, don’t worry.”

“I wasn’t worried.” Kihyun’s cheeks flush, and she takes a bite of her toast, hoping to avoid saying something more embarrassing.

Hoseok isn’t letting her off the hook that easily. “Last night was fun,” she says, and Kihyun coughs, trying not to choke as the memory of last night comes back in clear, sober detail. The way Hoseok’s lips felt on hers. The weight of her breath; her thighs. The guilt Kihyun feels for using the memory for her own pleasure.

“Fun isn’t exactly the word I’d use.”

“Why not?” Hoseok peels the foil off the top of her yogurt, licking the excess off the reverse side.

Kihyun’s eyes lock onto Hoseok’s mouth, the way she laps the yogurt up easily with long, measured swipes of her tongue. It’s an innocent action, but in Kihyun’s mind it turns to sin. How would it feel if Hoseok licked her like that?

“Kiki?” Hoseok’s voice draws her out of the fantasy. She’s waiting for an answer.

“My head’s killing me,” Kihyun says, which is only half true. Her headache is mostly gone, but trying to control her feelings is taking a toll on her mind.

“Oh no, sweetie, I’m sorry.” Hoseok reaches across the table, putting her hand over Kihyun’s, and Kihyun prays her face doesn’t light up bright red, burning from the touch of her skin. “Did you take some medicine?” Kihyun nods. "Hopefully it kicks in soon.”

Kihyun pulls her hand away from Hoseok’s, hiding her face in her hands. “I shouldn’t have drank so much,” she mumbles.

It’s not really the alcohol she regrets. And she doesn’t regret what happened at the party—she enjoyed kissing Hoseok, and that’s the problem. Kihyun can’t even look at her without thinking about her lips, her mouth, and it’s wrong. Hoseok doesn’t see her like that. If she did, if she knew how Kihyun thinks of her, she wouldn’t have been so casual about Kihyun seeing her naked this morning.

Maybe Hoseok is onto her, maybe she knows there’s something more on Kihyun’s mind, because she asks, “Do you remember what happened last night?”

The answer is yes. Of course she remembers; that single kiss is going to be burned on the back of her eyelids whenever she closes them for at least the rest of the semester, if not the rest of her life. But if she says yes, what’s Hoseok going to say? _“We should do it again sometime?”_ Not a chance. More like “ _That was funny, right?”_ , _“I was hoping you forgot,”_ or _“Let’s pretend it never happened.”_

_S_ o Kihyun lies. “Not really,” she says. She lifts her head, and Hoseok looks away, taking a sip from her water bottle.

“Oh. Well, we made forty bucks from some frat guy.” She pulls out her wallet, dropping a wrinkled twenty on the table in front of Kihyun. “There’s your share.”

Kihyun cracks a smile. “What, did he bet on some drinking game or something?” she asks, pocketing the money.

“Something like that.” Hoseok doesn’t seem interested in sharing the real reason for their earnings, which is proof enough for Kihyun: Hoseok only did it for the money. Kihyun could blame the kiss on the money or the alcohol, but that would be a bigger lie than saying she doesn’t remember it.

She likes Hoseok. She wants to kiss her again, to do so much more than that, but Hoseok would never want any of that from her. They’re friends. Kihyun should feel lucky they’re even that, not ruin it by wanting something more. 

Hoseok is gorgeous. Even with no makeup and her blonde hair pulled in a ponytail, she looks better than Kihyun does when she actually makes an effort. Hoseok is the type of girl who belongs in a sorority; the only reason she didn’t join one is because she found out they require their members to have the same makeup and wear their hair in identical styles for meetings.

“Fuck that,” Hoseok said. It was their first night in the dorm, and Kihyun, Hoseok, and their roommates were sitting on the floor in Hoseok and Hyungwon’s room telling icebreakers. “Life is too short to do what other people tell you, you know?”

That was when Hoseok explained the tattoo on her thigh—“Life is C between B and D,” choice between birth and death; the choice is yours, not what other people determine for you.

Until then, Kihyun assumed Hoseok was like the popular girls from her high school: shallow and vindictive, with a hobby of making Kihyun feel like hell for being shorter and chubbier and having curls that liked to frizz out instead of laying sleek and shiny. Their constant teasing was one of the reasons Kihyun gave up having a social life and focused on academics. Hearing Hoseok turned down a sorority and had a French philosopher’s quote inked on her skin was the first clue she was different.

Maybe that’s the moment Kihyun fell for her.

Or maybe it was when Kihyun’s roommate Minhyuk asked to see the tattoo, and instead of pulling up a picture on her phone, Hoseok stood up and stripped down to her pink thong to show everyone.

Probably both, if she’s honest.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Come find me on twitter @kinkyacewonho


End file.
